Dharma Glimpse by Imogen Healy
I have felt very unsettled and unstable this week.
I am moving house soon which marks the start of a new chapter in my life in many ways. This left me with this ‘desperation’ to cling onto something that could feel stable, like “me” again.
I kept trying to grasp for this sense of who I am in such changeable things.
The way my hair looks, my work, what time I was getting out of bed, my feelings. All felt forceful, I was trying to make things other than they were.
Upon accepting these things, and reflecting, I realised I am not that or that or that.
Rather than ‘I am unsettled’, I started to say I ‘feel’ unsettled. I feel that but I am not that. This subtle change in perspective seemed to free up a lot of space for me. It meant that I could feel something but not be so caught up in making it personal. I became the one experiencing rather than being blown around in the wind with all of these changeable things.
Just asking the question – if I am not these feelings, then who am I?
It was here I found some sense of stability without trying. The door just opened.
Namo Amida Bu
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